My children insist on texting me instead of calling and most of their messages go unread. I have some days off however Im scared of taking a trip to meet him because Ive never done this before. That I have set a date and he wont commit to it, I gave my phone number and he wont call. What was happening is I was over analysing and he was trying to second guess me and work me out . Its not. I know my advice is for women but almost 100% of it applies to you too. I met this guy on talktostranger. He said he didnt mean we sleep together, sorry he made a mistake and wished me well. The following day I texted saying I had a good night and he agreed but since then the texting has died down. Just let them know thats what you prefer, and that you hope that works for them. Nope youre not crazy. Your reply would be greatly appreciated. He openly admitted the logistics are probably not feasible for a viable relationship to give me what I want or deserve but the door wasnt completely closed. The next day, I thought he would at least say something, but nothing for the whole day. He will not see me in person. At least take the time to get to know me before you assume I want to cuddle, hug and kiss! I have been texting with a guy I met online for just about 3 months now. Including as a backup date! Most men online act like boys. He secondary mistake was thinking he could build a relationship by texting bland, unimaginative questions like How was your day? Texting takes a fair bit of concentration and pulls the person away from other tasks, so you need to make sure its worth the effort for them. Cant really say whats going on with him but I can say that you need to move on and devote your energy to meeting other men who show up. Talk about each others lifestyles. Dont get hung up on fear of sounding needy, ok? Heartbroken. HELP WHAT SHOULD I DO NEXT!!! and What to Say to Man in Difficult Situations. Do I just leave it be now and move on? I wont even let him touch certain body parts, i told him he needs to earn it. Ive been communicating with someone by text for two months. If you've already sent one or two texts and he's not replied, don't waste your time double texting him. Thanks for your post. You've agreed to end the relationship and move forward, but they keep sending the occasional text or photo along with a "This made me think of you," or "Missed you today." If he sees your picture and profile and wants to meet you, the hunter in him wants to get directly to the result: meeting you. Oh please stop waiting. As I didnt get anything back from my last text I decided to stop. It starts off greatthen he disappears. Bp. When you stop texting to see what he does, you have nothing to lose. There are hundreds more than that guy. I never nag or chase him. Thanks theman! I am looking for a relationship, and would like to see if that could be a possibility for us. Hes been texting everyday since Fri. Did I make a mistake reaching out to him again? If not, then you both are free to do whatever youd like. He tells you how much he likes you and even acts super interested in your life. Let me know how it goes. Weve started talking through email, then message texts ( several a day), and phone calls as well. Need help with your relationship? Bent on never committing. But got the good morning text Nothing major, just hows ur day stuff. I really enjoyed chatting with him. I said when do you like and he said tomorrow or Monday. In addition to this, I find him cute, Ive seen photos of him which are recent, he thinks Im attractive too and has made that clear on numerous occasions. I am waiting for him to tell me if he wanna go with me but he didnt. Are they showing you attention IRL? Theres a piece of me that makes this whole experience feel less magical if thats all he is. It's also important to be open and honest about your intentions. But that is pattern. He said once, Im really looking forward to meeting you, you make me smile a lot., I did anticipate that there would some text fatigue on either end at some point- texting someone youve never met and keeping it up for four months on the daily seems like a task to me. I gave him an opportunity to say If he wants to meet and he said he cant wait when it happens. Sounds like yours is. Hmmmnot surprising but I have to say that these arent Date Like a Grownup women. Do you think hes just not ready or is he seeing if Im still available to him. I even asked if he would come visit where I live and he was bold on the NO. Conversations are more like greeting and kind of what he is up to. Theres no guessing. He has several Facebook profiles. He wanted to meet up about a month ago but I had plans already. The next day the texts started to taper off, but they were long texts. Thanks so much for the fast reply. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. No second-guessing. I must say it has been so long and it is flirtatious but probably needs to end, even though I thought Id never need this again, but it has made me realize there is something alive in me yet and I may want to pursue something more. I should just ignore him from now on right? I asked him if he now stays a bit in town or if he has already packed for another trip And he replied after a while that he would indeed be going again for another 7 week trip in a couple of days. He said he missed his exit and blew his front tire trying to make it to the exit after he realized he passed it. There are a lot more where he came from! We continued to talk and even see each other on and off. Will he notice this. This guy keeps giving me hopes that we are gonna see each other by saying we will hang out again and everything and texts me all day and night. Yet I do what to give him space and take not rush into anything. For most of us older gals its just not much of an option. The second time we set up to meet I went and bought a dress , shoes, nails etc. Youre not looking for a text-buddy right? I tell him it is because I never know what version of him I am going to get on text and I am tired of being called names etc. I do like her though. When a man is interested he lets you know. I plan to let him know what im looking for between us and move on if I dont see any improvement. Im 45, tall, blond and quite attractive and dont have a problem getting men. Also for the years I have been texting him, he has been single. Move on please. No, dont ignore! Its over now and I feel so heartbroken.. yesterday I sent several texts saying I was sorry for pushing him away ( with no response)and Im struggling this morning wanting to say hi or for the high I feel of his banter. I dont know why he keeps texting me or what he wants. He wanted to say hi but did said he thought that I would have thought he was a perv who wanted to talk to me. Kind of realizing that we will never meet, because while the conversation is great, the connection is there, he might be a texter. Last weekend I went to visit someone who I have been video chatting with for more than a month. To be open. Editor's Note: This story has been updated by Elite Daily Staff. Best to you. during the weekdays he would let me know he was off work then later text me goodnite. Is he ultimately looking for the same as you? Sorry for that but happens to most of us at some time(s) or another. Allright, two days later I texted him, that it was my last day, that night I would fly home. I dont want to be responsive to anyone at all hours of the day or night. I couldnt believe that I am receiving all those compliment. A lot of women do not and take it as a bad sign from a guy. Time will tell. I texted him, he responded 3 hrs. Ive been so busy, this is my first day with free time this week. He is again traveling this weekend so no one made any mention of when we are seeing each other next. He always initiates conversation whether he text last or not and calls me( I never initiate convo because Im to confused). Dont let one woman bring you down, ok? But Skype is the next best thing. We agreed to a 2nd date two weeks ago and have spoke about it but he couldnt give me a date he is coming over. Maybe im missing something. Why would you put up with his being hot and cold after all this time? In the infatuation stage, it's normal to 'not get enough of each other.' Next! Hope that works for you! She wants to know how to stop obsessing over him being The One. Is he not into me, or just not into communication? That's a HUGE excuse to keep you at arm's length. Two days after meeting and texting, he asks if Im spontaneous and if I would like to go to his city for the weekend and he can show me around. A phone call that lasted 3.0 hours long. Bp. Get away from this man. I look forward to it, pretty sure you and i could make hanging out in a paper bag fun ;-)! He asked me to just forget about it and we go back to normal and move on from that topic. I like texting and calling.more calling is even better.. Hello! So heres my very brief story, met a guy online and started dating him after a months time. Right? Enjoy!! Self love is riding high today! One day when I was in his apartment and enjoyed his cocktails I was totally drunk then we had sex then. Hes shares very little about his dog. We arent friends, b. Youre dating someone else and dropped off the face of the earth c. I am a single mum who has a business and works part time- I dont have time to waste on people who are playing games or keeping me in the wings. I only carry my cell phone when I leave the house. I thoroughly dislike text. Now he just texts me gm, then I dont hear from him all day till 8p.m. Its very odd how someone can go from acting super interested in you to now ignoring you after telling them i dont want to text 24/7. Sometimes they can be very patient about setting someone up. Please give me some advices !!! Bp. I met a guy over a year ago at a football game and we hit it off. If YOU initiated the once a week call, he is not into it. And since then hes only texted me. Hi Susan. I know I can not call him..as I dont want to be the one chasing him. Its more and more in my head, if this is actually going somewhere or I am being strung along, but I dont think it is good to have a conversation like that over text, rather in person? Seems like you do have a true runner here. You dont know him yet, but There are a couple nice signs that its worth trying to. I realize your situation is challenging and you may have to adjust for it. What do you think I should do ? Its so different these days. The Theory, Explained, By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. I a voracious txter.. Anyway, I actually will use how a men texts and communicates as a screening tool. Then he suggested WhatsApp so we can send pictures again alarm bells but he assured me he just wanted to send pictures of his projects he worked on so I agreed. Or testing you. But for now, sounds like youre just dating. Sign in below with your name and best email: Subscribe With Confidence -No Spam Email Policies, I have enjoyed reading your words and found them very helpful in finding myself with guys. It is okay to be kind instead of putting guys through some kind of test. He then gave me his phone number and thats when the texting started. Thats the nature of dating perfect strangers from the internet. Six months later I was on the same dating site and he messaged me again saying long time we got chatting again he then said so would you like to begin again? Hi this is such good info. We both have a lot in common- were fairly easygoing, we like animals, vegetarianism, certain TV shows and memes- it seems/seemed were pretty compatible in certain ways. Sounds great right? Ask if he can do that. Bp. Last thing: stop initiating. But then at the same time Im like hes not my boyfriend. Is he actually interested and just afraid, or is he playing? I met this guy, wants an open relationship , we text and facetime. Bp. But what it really taught me was to show up for life if there was even the slightest chance that something great was on the other side. However he was leaving in another state and didnt tell me. He disappears ( goes off the grid) on non work days. And in relationahip, there IS a thing as too much verbal communication. Ideally less than an hour drive. Were both grown adults (35/37) who enjoy each others company when were together so I dont understand why he is being this wayas a woman it does make me feel a bit insecure, like hes losing interest, or maybe he feels like he doesnt have to make an effort anymoreI dont know if I might just be over analyzing things since I am starting to develop stronger feelings for him and Im afraid he might be drifting apart. I stopped asking to see him. Or should I just not respond at all? Bp, Hi AS. We have been chatting since Dec. 24th 2021. I met a guy on POF this weekend. Whether its because they found someone else, were just playing or because they got scared thats 100% immaterial. Live your life and dont beat yourself up, my friend. Give him space and support. I didnt text him all these days to see if he really cares the conversation we shared and he definitely knew that i would be waiting for his text which i have told him jn previous fight we had But he failed to text me this time too I find him online sometimes ( very rare) .. but do u think, if he is angry that iam seeking a lot of attention or he had been playing mind games or What? Find resonance. Unfortunately, women do the same thing. Not sure what to do here, as its very enjoyable both in person and on the phone to talk. Only the context varies. While this early phase can be really exciting, it's OK and normal for things to slow down over time as you get into a natural routine. And we cannot meet as he lives in another state. But this article does bring some clarify. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. He sounds excited to see you, but he always seems to be too busy to meet. Oh when togeather we have pleasnt conversations but it seems like were both either shy or aqward, so far he has had only the best manners. This on line dating has been a bear to say the least. I need your thoughts. They see online dating as a perpectual candy store. All day, every day. Was an excusehe would get a gf then leave. You dont know if hes truly mature and patient as you say. I dont really mind unless its bad advice (in which case Ill call them out) or its someone trying to hijack or affect my business. We made plans for me to fly up to visit for a few days next month for Thanksgiving. Right? I would have liked to see him again but didnt really feel it was mutual. Sounds like he doesnt like to text. Is he sending things to impress you? He told me he didnt mean to be rude. He wouldnt approach (but talks to everyone else). Okay, so I met this guy on a dating site and we connected and we met for coffee, connected in person and went out again the next day. Or just Skype more. if hes not or cant say what he wants, move on. Good for you. I started chatting with a guy from a dating site. But what was this really telling me? (Certainly not him, yet.) And dont like the way he canceled the supposed date. Youre thinking there is no one else. What about my gut feeling? We established that were both free on the weekends but he kept saying, Well have to find a time the more i pushed for us to either talk on the phone or meet in person i noticed it would take him longer to reply. He has a speech impediment and told me its hard for him to get words out. He really could be just thinking of your safety. He asked me out and had a great date. He think I dont trust him. He did pick up the phone he is putting his dog down. Bp, Im 50 and back on the dating scene after 17 years off it. Because I think Im clear the way I act that I like him somewhat . Not until he tells you directly that he is committed and exclusive. I get it. This month I have a chance to go to his living city then I told him that we could arrange to meet each other he was so happy and eagerly waiting for that. Met a guy, he seems like a real type Two. When I got to work, he had already texted me have a great day to which I replied equally quickly that I wish him the same, and then no answer until the next morning 6 am when I was woken up by his early reply. If its any indication what my advice is, I tell all my clients to turn chat OFF when youre online. Texting. I know Im being played, knew from the beginning. Bp. My bday is tomorrow he suppose to come over. There are days where I dont even want to try anymore. When a guy stops texting you every day or when a girl is slower to respond than usual, it can mean everything, but it could just as easily mean absolutely nothing. Bp. Since then hes texted asking about my day for the past 2 days but still hasnt asked me out again. Didnt hear from her but texted her a while after I got home saying hope you got home ok. Id ask him by calling not texting. We have texted or talked on the phone everyday. Ive been feeling that his interests in me has been waning because hes replies are mostly responses to whatever it is I was opening up conversation for. I told him that I wanted to meet and it was on him. During your road trip Id have a grownup conversation with him about whether hes looking for the same thing you are. It may be challenging because you want to get to know him and your time is limited but TRUST ME that texting is no way to do it! But if there is no actual in-person contact beware! Texts was our only communication-huge red flag. He explaint himself with stress and he needs time to write me properly, but his head is stucked in stress. I do date other men. So if hes looking for something more than one fun night, a good man will do what he can to impress you by asking you out, and then be in your presence. 2 He's Online, But Takes Forever To Reply To Your Messages Image via Unsplash When you see that the guy's online and has read your message but hasn't replied, it's really frustrating. we start texting and at times we talk on the phone. Im no fling. I texted him a second time after three months total of not hearing from him. But it only lasted one year and now he has more time again. Soon as we decided we were finally going out, she got worse with responding. The thing is, hes asking me such pointless things, like whats your favourite colour, What are you doing now? What are your plans for tomorrow? I am not a big texter I feel that if I want to tell someone something specific, Ill text (Im not a technophobe) but Im not one for conversing for ages back and forth pointless things. Then nothing for two days then a call to say he was on a long distance haul with work he drives a delivery van he said he was thinking about coming to see me when he got back but it would be too late that night 9.30 or 10pm and he was exhausted. Please Help! G'luck! I did reach out to him initially and the next day he responded. He suggested meeting and I was happy to meet up. I thought he was the one. What do you suggest I do? We have no plans to meet up. Hi Maria, Youve asked very directly for what you want, which is 100% reasonable. After the dates he immediately contacted me to say what a wonderful time he had. Doesnt really matter whats going on with him. Still not even one actual phone call because he says he hates talking on the phone. Sometimes, people look at their text messages on their Apple Watches and think, Ill respond to this later, and then completely forget to respond, says Maria Avgitidis, CEO of matchmaking service Agape Match and host of the dating podcast Ask a Matchmaker, and this is a perfectly valid explanation. Hi, Ive been single for 5 years following my divorce and am a single mum. And he said he never felt to from a woman what he felt from me. Determining that the best thing to do was consolidate, she poured the remaining expired milk into the good jug, much to her mother's chagrin. We spoke after that but it was because I was reaching out to him. Its no use trying to figure out why men do what they do, LL. The next day after our final, I expressed to her how I felt and how I like her not just her external looks but her good heart, morals, and so on. Perhaps he just wants to talk again so he can ask you out. He was sending her all types of gifts that she posted on her insta story. If its something you regret, then its a good idea to take time for some introspection. Best. If not, cool. What if he came home and I was going to date him? The fact is, texting itself is an unreliable barometer of interest in a relationship. I told him blatantly I did not because its nerve racking to me which he seemed disappointed in hearing. He makes future plans with me and says hes coming up soon. Mention that you have noticed a decrease in communication and you're wondering if something is going on that you're not aware of. If he resists, MOVE ON. All of a sudden he sent a text saying that he wants to see someone hes in a relationship with at least 2 or 3 times a week and expects me to be spontaneous and maybe I have a rigid work schedule. She tells me that she loves me and wants to be with me. I couldnt understand it, why would he text me what he does then disappear? However, Im not sure if Im wasting my time. I want to say thank you for having these websites where I can come back and read. Id like to get to know you but I find texting isnt the best way. After our second date last Friday, he called me on the Sunday of Xmas week and we talked for an hour. Nevertheless, I ended this. I patrolled around your neighborhood where I last dropped you off on our date (8 years ago) . He lives like 3 hours away.. He asked to meet 2 weeks ago in between his trips but canceled last minute. We had like moments where we connected. Hugs, Bp. For instance, its a great way to clarify plans or make last minute updates to the plan. He mentioned that it could be arranged on a weekend, best for him. You didnt know this man at all, right? You can. The problem was that i was leaving the next day for the city i currently work which is 5 hours away. Bp. Weve had a few really nice dates and Im trying to adjust my expectations because hes not an avid, flirty texted. It seems this guy wants to know many details about me before he comes into NYC (if ever) to meet me. Sorry, I cant know the answer. If you don't hear back, move on. By the way, I asked him thrice to breakup with him and he said no. Then ten days later he sends me messages apologising for dropping off the Face of the earth and that he has had a few dates with someone else and wanted to update me and could we still be friends. I did make a sort of joke about not beeing used to be cancelled and agreed. He refused saying that he was not looking for casual specially with me neither willing to date. Hi there..pls demystify this situation for me. 12. I know I sent to many text messages and he know that I have been hurt a lot and has been very understanding of that. I thought we clicked but the next day he never texted, that night he posted on Facebook his cell stopped working and thats why he couldnt contact anyone But today I messaged him a happy new year, he replied it back but thats it No personal message. I am worried i am being strung along and will get hurt. Or am I just stroking his ego. Id keep it that way with him and certainly introduce lots of other potential men in your life and youll be just fine. He said: what a beautiful picture! He didnt reschedule or hasnt really flirted like normal. Hes acting the same way he did before you hopped into bed with him, right? They feel that chatting first just gets in the way and would rather skip the phone and/or email. A 60yr old man approached me in a date site. Read some of my posts on communication and also expectations, okay? A grownup man will take it seriously and respond. Now the first day we texted alot. He mentioned at some point that he was shy so i gave him the benefit of the doubt and told him we should just meet up in person instead. Now he DOES want to have kids with me. He then sent me a few texts that were friendly in nature. I said I dont know where this has come from and Im not looking for marriage Ive just got divorced. But I think that it is a setup that he has gotten someone to pose as a daughter to talk to me. If not exactly where youre going, get the time and date. Should I initiate the conversations? We met online, he's a young professional, everything's he's told me checks out (I've googled liked crazy), we connect so well, texts are flirty, we exchange pictures, and it's been going on for 2 months. I do want to see what his personality is like (i have seen him before but never spoken to him). I made a joke that he wasnt to chatty today. I met up with a guy from highschool hes started texting n than calling every night than after 3 months I invited to meet him said he was busy than all of a sudden he said his fb was hacked n started to text less n less now stopped calling hes 53 never married no kids???? We are supposed to meet, so will see if they follow through. Your advice? 2) The fact hes hiding what he looks like now should tall you that hes hiding something else. Sometimes a woman doesn't make it easy on him through how she connects with him. I know he was somewhat inebriated when we were talking. However, we reconnected few weeks later. No thanks. Since then he has kept it strictly text and now says he is uncomfortable seeing me until we can have a good text relationship. Bp, Okay so I have known this guy since high school and we still live in the same town. I can see why even good, solid, single men love texting. I've been texting with a man every day for a month. Be patient, though. Texted near daily for another week. We texted every single day. Havent texted her since, and Im not sure if I am making a mistake by doing so, but I feel that texting isnt really necessary right now because we both feel mutual. Hence the eventual pull back and run routine once again. Theres lots more everywhere. If hes interested he will get in touch. So I found out that if he REALLY wanted to make things happen, he actually picked up the telephone and called me, left a message and answered my phone calls. and gave me his phone number and I sent him a text so that he could have mine as well. If youre not getting to know real things about him then start sharing about yourself. NO. In between that week, the texts fell off drastically. Im texting this guy I found on tinder. Are you kidding me?? Read everything I could get hold of on widowers and dating and for now, I am trying not to take it personally and am at least emailing other men on line in case things go south. This is a VERY typical reaction from a type two guy. If youre on here to directly respond to peoples stories, then I suggest you start your own blog! You have fallen for a FANTASY. 4. It all felt so fake. He gave me his number, we started texting in whatsapp and then he found my facebook profile. He Wants Sex 9. If he relies on text too much, or does it too frequently, hes done. I had been hooking up with this guy for 2 months. Should I let this go since we are having in person contact? Melissa stayed up until 3 AM texting with her dude. Bp, I met up with a guy through an online app and we hit it off pretty well. How should I bring this up to him? You Have To Know 3 Things To Understand All The Signs Hes Interested. I said no just busy with work deadline. When he calls and asks you out, THAT is what counts. We hit it off. So well in fact we had 2 more dates after that. Its not about the waiting I just dont know if Im being a fool again I read your blog and slot of what you say rings true I know it I just dont know how to verbalize through txt my standard without possibly ruining everything this could be the guy for me please help your suggestion re: sending him a message about wanting to hear his voice Im afraid that if I do that I will scare him away as he hasnt made any attempt to do it for himself..and this laid back attitude Ive had to portray is just meaning I dont txt at all the have to appear as if Im ok and happy when he does txt which Im seriously not Im sad insideany help you could give as to what would be my best form of action to his txt silence now for about a day where mid conversation 9pm at night he simply went off radar again no goodnight or anything no hoodmorning or any txt all day yesturday and its 12.21am now and still nothing. We actually had gone to the same school way back when. We exchanged numbers and started to text all night long. I suspended my match account after a few weeks of chatting with him because I couldnt cope with chatting to different guys when I was more interested in this one. And remember you know very little about him so if for some reason he doesnt respond or respond the way you want him to dont waste any emotional energy on it. For me he just blew it why would he even suggest a weekend away. Please dont waste your time on a fantasy, ok? Sounds like you are developing a nice relationship. He always treats me so gently and sweet. 1. he doesnt respect what I say. He said I dont know I like you a lot. There are so many ways to know if a man is a serious guy who is interested in getting to know you. Less is more in the text world. Nothing about going out, dinner, a hike..just nothing. Texting stopped that night due to us both being busy with finals coming up. Im not an experienced at dating at all since Ive been married my whole life . Why Men Disappear From You - Learn the real reason why men disappear from your life & how to stop it from happening again. Hes planning to drive to see me soon. I like a male acquaintance. If hes too busy to even meet with you, then hes certainly too busy for any kind of relationship. At the 1st time we met he seemed to talk to people very naturally and so friendly. Youll get your answer there. Then he just walked out of my life without so much as an explanation. He's more comfortable virtually. i was like eh whatever. He wanted to meet up in New York in December since hell be going there.